Has it Really Been That Long?

I truly can't believe it has been 9 months since my last blog post!  Wow!

There has been so much going on in our lives.  Some good. Some great. Some troublesome. Some difficult. But no matter what it is, we are just attacking it day by day.  We are not the ones in control.  It is my prayer that as we move through this seemingly endless season of our lives that we show the love of the One who is in control.

Here is the scoop on the last 9 months...

Princess TD

Wow!  She is turning into such a sweet young lady right before our eyes.  She is about to be 10 years old, but has such wisdom.  School for this year has had its challenges.  She is capable of completing all of the work, but just like every other student out there, she would rather play than study most days. Especially in the very mild and beautiful weather we have had for the past few months.  Hey, I am right there with her!  I would rather be playing than teaching, cleaning, paying bills, etc. Academically, she is doing great.  She loves math, science, reading and history.  She is less fond of grammar, but does very well. She is still struggling some with spelling, but that has greatly improved this year.

She is still enjoying American Heritage Girls and is in her first year in the Explorer Unit.  She is such a good helper to the Unit and to me as the Unit Leader.  She and Little TD help me set up the room and break it down at almost every meeting.  She still loves to earn badges and has deepened her interest in several badges she earned as a Tenderheart.  Her goal this year was to earn the Presidential Service Award.  She didn't want to just earn the award.  She wanted to earn the Gold!  She looked everywhere for opportunities to serve others.  I rejoined a ladies Bible study, and she volunteered in the nursery.  She absolutely loved it and adores all of the kids.  Because of this, and our regular volunteering at a food pantry, she accomplished her goal!  She earned 107 hours of service in 1 year!  I am so proud of her!

She is still our little budding ballerina.  She loves ballet and this year we added modern.  She loved both classes and just completed her Grade 2 exam.  This year her confidence, grace and poise has just blossomed.  I love to see her stand tall and be proud.  She is completely opposite of how I was at the same age.  I absolutely hated being tall!  She is proud and confident and loves the fact that she can reach the pedals and see over the steering wheel of a Ford Mustang at the age of 9!  (Well maybe her love of sports cars is more like me than her daddy!) She is just over 5' tall and so very proud of it!

Little TD

What is there to say about this sweet boy!  He is so kind, generous and tenderhearted.  He is growing like a weed and just keeps getting taller and taller overnight!  School for him is going well.  He is my get there and just get it done kid.  He wants to keep going until it's done so he can play.  While Princess TD actually has true independent work, he is trying to keep up there with her.  He is calling his handwriting and math his independent work.  I think it's funny that he feels he can do math without instruction.  Well, maybe not so funny, he can do most of it without help!  Reading and spelling are his struggles this year.  It seems like just as he is about to take off, something happens and he forgets everything he learned.  I have come to the conclusion that what I am currently doing with him is not working and I am looking for new solutions for next year.  I will keep you posted there.

This year was Little TD's first year in scouting. He has wanted to be a scout for so long and go camping with his friends like Princess TD does with AHG.  This year we joined the Cub Scout Pack at the same church where we do AHG.  It has turned out to be a pretty good year.  He has completed his Tiger rank and will be bridging to Wolf this week.  He is having so much fun and can't wait to get started on the Wolf requirements.

He played basketball for the second year with Upward.  He had great coaches this year and Mr. TD even stepped in to help with the coaching of the boys playing post position.  He has some natural talent (which obviously comes from Mr. TD and not me!), but needs to spend more time working on the basic skills.  But hey, he's only 7, so he's not quite old enough to play professionally yet! ;-)  He has also been playing catch with the neighbor boy who plays baseball.  I am still hoping to have my ambidextrous boy be a pitcher for the St. Louis Cardinals...a mom can dream, right?!?

Mr. & Mrs. TD

I think we have had the roughest 9 months of our lives.  Being a parent raising children, homeschooling, working, maintaining a home and being the only caretakers for an ailing parent is not a fun place to be.  I have heard this called the "sandwich generation."  That sounds great, but sandwiches are good and this is not a good place to be!  It is hard to care for someone who doesn't want to be cared for, and doesn't want to care for herself.  I know in my heart that this is the right thing to do, and I am so completely blessed to have a wonderful husband who will support me through this time.  I know this is hard on him. I know this is hard on my kids.  This is hard on me.  I have spent quite a bit of time looking for resources to encourage me on this journey.   I am looking for something from a Christian perspective on caring for a parent while raising young kids.  There is not much out there. It was suggested that I journal my journey (which I am doing) and publish it.  I have heard that said several times by several people who do not know each other. I don't know about publishing it, but I may consider blogging about it on a separate blog.  Please pray for me to know if this is something that I should really consider.  I don't want to add something else to my plate, but I feel like I need to tell my story.  Maybe it is to make me feel better and confirm that I have actually extended forgiveness.  Maybe it is because someone else needs to know that healing and forgiveness are available to them.

History

"Those that fail to learn from history, are doomed to repeat it"

- Winston Churchill

My kids love American history.  It makes sense.  At a very young age, Princess TD learned she shared her birthday with our country and naturally that intrigued her.  Of course, Little TD has always been intrigued by the boats and the wars.  He is a boy after all!

Our curriculum spends two full years studying American history before moving on to covering world history.  There are many reasons for that but the one that resonates the most with me is that younger children do not understand their vastness of their city, or state, or country, let alone the world.  It just makes sense to start with an overview of our country’s history and then branch out from there.  So, for the past 3 years we have been covering American history. 

There have been a couple of times that the knowledge they have has surprised me.  One night as Jay Leno was doing his Jaywalking segment, they had 5 questions about America.  I knew all of the correct answers, but I was curious how much Princess TD would know (at the time, she was the only one in “school”).  When it was over, I wrote the questions down to see what she would say.  She got all but one question right!!  In all fairness, the one she missed we hadn’t studied. Now I know this is for humor, but there are many Americans who don’t know our country’s history.  That is a shame.

Back in March, Kirk Cameron did a live release of his documentary Monumental.  I was unable to attend the live event because our local theaters sold out before I could get tickets.  The following week, I ordered the DVD.  It came in this week.  I watched it this weekend while Mr. TD napped since I knew he wasn’t as excited as I was to see the film.  I thoroughly enjoyed the film.  I was a bit distracted by the precious little ones playing camping on the other side of the couch, but I own the movie, I can watch it whenever I want!

Well, Little TD and Princess TD were not distracted too long.  Little TD heard Kirk mention the town of Scrooby, and he pops his head over the back of the couch and says, “Hey! I know that! That’s where the Pilgrims hid and worshipped God!”  He also knew that the Speedwell did not make the trip to the New World.  He said, “It got a hole in it",” as soon as it was mentioned in the film.  Princess TD remembered the Pilgrims getting stopped at the beach and said it happened twice, before the movie did.  She also remembered that they stayed in Amsterdam for a bit before moving on to Leiden.  Once they began investigating the monument in detail, they went back to playing camping.

This was just confirmation for me that even with all of the unintended breaks we have taken from our school, they are learning and I am not ruining them! 

If you are a history buff and want to learn more about why our country was founded, I highly recommend this film.  It is family friendly, so don’t feel like you have to see it without the kids.  In fact, show it to them.  They may learn something that they wouldn’t be taught in school.

Back to (Home) School

With everything that has been going on in our family life over the past two years, schooling has somewhat fallen to the back burner more often than I would truly like to admit.  But we have been plugging right along, slowly but surely.  Originally when we decided to homeschool, it was a year to year plan.  Now, not so much.  We are planning to homeschool for the long haul.  I can’t even begin to tell you how freeing that decision has made this journey. 

This has become our lifestyle.  Everything we do has some aspect of learning.  For example, tonight at the dinner table, we were talking about the sad event of three people being struck by lightening over the weekend.  We all feel bad for the people affected by the tragedy and the kids will pray for them forever.  (That is how they are. Once you make their prayer list, you never get missed and are prayed for daily, at least once.) But Mr. TD was able to turn it into a learning experience to talk about what to do (and not to do) if we are caught outside during a lightening storm.  Being the curious children Princess TD and Little TD are, they began to ask some in depth questions about electricity.  Let me just say for the record how grateful I am to have married an electrical engineer!  While, I can adequately answer their questions, I was so glad to have Mr. TD around to patiently explain the concept of electricity flow to them.  They have an understanding of those concepts that I didn’t have until college…after I met Mr. TD and he explained them to me!!  Thanks hon!

So, as so many of our homeschooling friends are gearing up for the new year and searching and researching curriculum, we are set!  Thanks to a very sweet homeschooling mom who pointed me toward Heart of Dakota when I was searching for something for Princess TD to use for Kindergarten, we are set until Carrie stops writing curriculum, which I hope is not until her children finish high school!

Two years ago, I ventured to Arlington, Texas, for the Book Fair there because that is the closest location where Carrie Austin, the author of the Heart of Dakota curriculum, comes for homeschool convention season.  I made the trek because I was concerned about Princess TD getting too far ahead too quickly.  There is a pretty big skills jump from one guide to the next and I was afraid Princess TD would not be able to keep up with what was required.  Carrie was so very helpful and suggested that I don’t have to do everything as written and do what Princess TD could handle, gradually increasing it as she could handle more.  That is exactly what I did and she did great!  Carrie also suggested taking a year and a half to complete Bigger Hearts for His Glory so she would be more ready to tackle Preparing Hearts for His Glory.  That would also move her from the younger end of the age ranges to more of the middle of the range.  That was my plan.

However, due to the circumstances of the last two years, it took us longer than what was expected to complete Bigger.  But, that puts us right where we need to be! Even with all of the missed school time, Princess TD is right where she needs to be.  Her skills are such that we can jump right into Preparing and not have to do it half time, or slow anything down.  She is ready!  Even out of all the turmoil, we are being blessed!  Praise God!!

I have tweaked the curriculum to change some things that were not working for us.  I thought I might need to change the spelling program for Princess TD, but in the last couple of weeks, her spelling has just taken off!  She seems to all of a sudden be getting it!  So, I think we’ll stick with what we are doing for now!

You may be thinking, what does all of this mean?

Well, for one, I can go to the THSC Convention & Family Conference in a couple of weeks and just enjoy myself!  I don’t have to be on a mad search for curriculum.  I don’t NEED to buy anything!  I have everything I need and I can just have fun.  Secondly, this tells me that we are on the right track, for now. 

We are blessed!!

Whew!

We are getting there!!!  I think we are getting close to the point where we can be adjusted to the "new normal" around here.  Maybe...

Just as we thought everything was going smoothly, the clinic where mom's doctors were closed!  Yes closed! Shut their doors!  All of the doctors, nurses and staff were fired with 5 days notice!  So, we have found a new PCM and are kind of sitting back and waiting to see where all of her specialists land.  Hopefully we can still see at least a few of them (we are up to 7 doctors now...maybe 8 soon!).  Taking her meds has continued to be a struggle, so I finally made the decision to have someone come in and give them to her.  This has been such a relief.  I don't have to check her pills when we visit, we can just visit!  We do however have to pay for it, and right now, that is the stress point for me.  I am trying to figure out how I can pay for this and everything else.  I really hope my sister and brothers will actually help out there!

 

While it seems like all I have done is take care of my mom for the last 7 months, we have had a little bit of fun time!  I won't take the time to do a post on everything, but I will give a few highlights!

• In January and February, Little TD played basketball with Upward.  He had an absolute blast and he actually has a little bit of natural talent!  Yeah, he gets that from his dad!



All ready for his first game!

• Princess TD continued this year with ballet.  She is improving all the time.  I love to see how her attitude and posture changes when she puts on the black leotard and pink tights.  It is amazing to see how poised she becomes!  She will be moving up a grade and taking ballet 2 nights a week and modern 1 night a week (thankfully modern is on a ballet night!).  I can't wait to see how much fun she has!



Just before Exams



Butterfly at Dress Rehearsal



• In January we took a family vacation and met my aunt and uncle at Disney World!  We stayed a week.  It. Was. So. Much. Fun.  Little TD said that he wanted to fly home, change out the clothes in his suitcase and come right back!  I think my aunt and uncle were a bit weary by the end of it...they may need more of a break than that!  Ever since I was a little girl, my uncle has been trying to get me to ride roller coasters with him.  I can remember standing in front of the Wabash Cannonball at Opryland at about 9 years old and refusing to go on it with him.  Well, he got his wish!  I finally rode a coaster with him...Expedition Everest.  It was so much fun!  We rode it 2 more times!  Maybe next time I won't be as congested and we can do a few more!

• Little TD finished Kindergarten and has moved right in to 1st grade.  He seems to be keeping up and wanting to learn more and more every day!  He just adores building with Legos, and is always asking to get more.  He wants more sets of course, but mostly he wants more "creation" Legos (as he calls them) so he can build from his imagination!  He does very well with that.  It may be time to look into some Lego robotics for him in another year or so...when he's old enough!
• Princess TD is almost finished with 3rd grade. Somehow we have finished some of the subjects, but not all of them...I am not sure where we got so far off in the schedule.  We just need to finish up a little bit of history, learning about the Wright brothers.  How can I not finish that and take the opportunity to discuss flow over the wing, wind tunnels and their experiments with air flow, and all of the things about fluid dynamics that make me giddy!
• Princess TD is till involved in American Heritage Girls.  She completed her 3rd year as a Tenderheart and her Sacagawea Level Award.  She has moved up to Explorer and she is already working on badges and service hours!  I will be moving up with her as I take over as the Explorer Unit Leader. 



She's an Explorer now!

• Our year of activities is technically over.  AHG is done.  Ballet is done. Whew!

Then summer starts.

• Both Princess TD and Little TD participated in a VBS last week. It was an old school VBS and they love it!  I got some nice time with my girlfriends, almost uninterrupted!  (Love ya Coop...you are so cute!)
• This week they are both in basketball camp.  They are both having fun and I think learning new skills.  Little TD told me today that he just needs to grow just 1 more inch and then he can dunk!  Yeah, well, he plays on a 6 ft. goal!  Princess TD, bless her heart, plays like her Mommy!  Although with Daddy coaching her at home, she will likely have me beat very quickly!

Well, those are just a few things that have been going on here.  Even with all of the turmoil, we are still taking time as a family and having fun!

Changes

It has been quite a while since I have posted anything here and for good reason.  We have been going through some changes, some positive and some, well, not so much.

Shortly after my last post, I began looking at senior living communities to see how much they cost and whether or not my mom could afford to live in one.  You see, after her diagnosis of metastatic bladder cancer, the resulting surgery and the 4 months of chemotherapy, she really was not able to live on her own.  My sister was gracious enough to let her live with her while her husband was serving in Afghanistan, but he was home.  Having a parent live with you is generally not good for your marriage, especially this parent!  And so began my search.  I searched based on the income my mom told me she was or would be receiving and found a place that was in her budget.  She moved into her new home in early December.

The first few weeks we spent several days a week there helping her to get adjusted.  Then Christmas came, and she stayed with us to celebrate Christmas morning with our family.  She was attending church with us and she seemed to be meeting people at her new place and jumping right in on the activities they have there.  We were and are all cautiously hopeful that we have made the right decision for her. 

Most of January and February has been spent going to doctor appointments to get her established with new care providers.  We found a great PCM, and then she left the practice just after our second visit, so we had to find another one.  We are now established with a new (new) PCM, an oncologist, a urologist, a cardiologist and have a new referral to a nephrologist.  We also have been referred to a neurologist to have testing completed to determine if there is something going on (or not going on) in her brain. 

This part has been pretty rough on my family (and my sister's family before mine). 

You see, none of us have had a great relationship with mom. Ever. This includes everyone in her life, not just her children.  But we have all noticed that she is "worse" than she has ever been.  She is not kind. She is not grateful. Frankly, most of the time she is downright rude and disrespectful to everyone around her.  This is hard to live with. Very hard!

I am the oldest of 4 children, but right now I feel the burden of caring for mom falling squarely on my shoulders alone.  My sister cared for her through her sickest days so far and managed beautifully.  However, she is a military wife of a wonderful military officer, and as military families do, it is time for them to move.  This is very scary for me because she will be gone.  We have become so close and though she’s just a phone call away, she won’t be able to hop in the car and be here if I need her.  Together we have made it through the last year together.  Yes, she had the burden of care, but she also knew I was just a phone call and a 3 hour(ish) car ride away.  They will be in Washington DC by the summer.  That is WAY more than 3 hours away! Both of my brothers live in Missouri; one drives an 18-wheeler for a living, and one works locally near their home.  They are both at least 14 hours away on a good day.

I am constantly thinking about mom’s financial future.  She has not made wise financial decisions in the past.  Through a misunderstanding, we now do not have enough income to make her monthly rent, let alone take care of the remaining bills for her house in St. Louis.  Currently my family is spending a significant amount of money out of our budget to care for her.  I don’t know how much longer we can do that without sacrificing the welfare of our little family.  At her current rate of spending, she will be out of her savings by the end of summer.  Then what?  I just pray her house sells before then.

That is another issue. Trying to get her house on the market and the stuff remaining in the house sold.  How?  What’s there?  Is there something special hidden, tucked away that would mean something to one of us?  My brothers have promised to help get the house ready, but frankly, I don’t trust that they will get it done in a timely manner.  Don’t misunderstand me. It is not that they don’t care, they do.  They have their families and their family activities and mom is “out of sight, out of mind” for them.  They don’t feel the crushing weight of the impending doom of mom running out of money.

It is the right thing to do, to take care of my mom.  Not just because she is my mom, but also because she is a widow.  As Christians, we are told to take care of the poor, the widows and the orphans.  Well my mom qualifies as both poor and a widow.  You see, if it weren’t for my father being killed in Vietnam, she would have almost no income and no medical insurance.  Here, 41+ years after his death, he is still taking care of her and providing for her future.  What a blessing that is for her! 

For us, taking care of her, is not an easy task.  This is a huge life lesson for all of us about doing what is right even when it is really hard!  We are learning how to make it through this one day at a time, one step at a time. 

Please pray for all of us.

Trick or Treat

We had a great night with some great friends last night.  We had a blast trick or treating and visiting.

Here is Princess TD as a bumblebee and Little TD as a Jedi.  It varied which Jedi he said he was, so I am still not sure which one he is here.

Little TD’s light saber actually lights up!  He loved that!  It reminds me of one day when I was home sick when Episode IV first came out way back when.  I was staying with my Grandma Siler for the day and she had to run to Stix, Baer and Fuller.  When we came up the escalator right at the top when we got off was a man dressed as Darth Vader complete with a lighted light saber.  He activated his light saber and then turned and spoke to me (all in the matter of a second or two) and I screamed!  It was very funny, but I was terrified at the time!  I have been watching for the return of the light up light sabers for Little TD.  I couldn’t believe they would deprive this generation of kids the cool stuff we had available as kids.  That was the most costly part of his costume this year, but he loves it!

Fall Leaves, Texas Style

Fall looks very different from what I grew up with in Missouri here in the piney woods of Texas.  My kids are missing out on the fun of raking the fallen leaves and jumping in the piles of leaves.  They won’t experience that here.  They have seen many shows and movies that have children playing in the raked leaves, so they are familiar with the tradition.  They decided this year to create their own version, Texas style!

Raking the pine needles….

and more raking….

and more raking!  We only have one pine tree, but it produces A LOT of pine needles!

Finally, they get to jump into the “leaves”… it was very short lived since the pine needles are very pointy and hurt when they stab you!

Then they cleaned up their pile.  They even did it without being asked!  Great helpers!

While all of our friends up north are enjoying raking and playing in real leaves, we will enjoy the shorts weather until Christmas!  Oh the joys of living in Texas!!

Experimenting with Science

At the homeschool conference this summer, I was able to put my hands on the science curriculum I have been eyeing on the internet for quite some time now.  Now, I absolutely love the Apologia Elementary series, but right now, that is more above Little TD’s head than I think I want to go at this point.  While I love our main curriculum, I have been struggling with the science portion for several years.  It seems more light than my kids are needing, but most homeschoolers that I talk with don’t worry about science in the early elementary years.  I guess it is the engineer in me that makes me want them to want science.

After I actually put my hands on the curriculum, A Reason for Science, and had my hubby look at it as well, we opted to go with Level B for both Princess TD and Little TD.  We decided that combining them in science and Bible would be the most advantageous for both of them and for me as the teacher!  One of the things that I loved about this program was that everything that we need for the experiments is included in the package.  When I pulled it all out to get started, I noticed that the first unit required something extra that I didn’t buy!!  It was not a huge deal, but I had to do a bit of searching to find the flowers that were needed.  Needless to say, we had to put off the first unit for a bit.

The first unit was to learn about how plants get water and nutrients through the stem. 

Princess TD inspecting the inside of the stem.

Little TD inspecting the inside of the stem.

In order to see how the plants use water, the experiment had us cut the stem of a white carnation in half and put half of the stem in blue colored water and half of the stem in red colored water.  We had to let the flowers stand for 24 hours without touching them to see the effects.

The experiment set-up and ready to go.

The flowers before.

The flowers after.

Little TD labeled the experiment a failure since the flowers were not as deeply colored as the picture in the book.  It is not clear in the picture, but half of the edges of each flower are colored red and the other half are colored  blue.  The entire petals did not color, but the edges did.  Princess TD loved the experiment and wanted to do it again. 

They love this new science program and can’t wait to do it every week!

How the Drought Affects Playtime

We recently took a trip to the local lake to have dinner along the lake shore for Mr. TD’s birthday.  We were looking at the docks and were discussing how we wouldn’t be able to pull our boat up to dock for lunch.  Even if there was enough water to float the boat, there would be no way we could get out of the boat and on to the dock!  The marina usually employs people to help you to tie off when you come in for shopping or dining.  They had a 8 ft. ladder laying on the dock to assist those who dare to pull in to get out of their boats!  I don’t think we’ll be heading out there anytime soon!

While Little TD waits for me to work on different subjects with Princess TD during school, he builds with his Trio blocks.  He has become very creative with what he builds.  This day, he was building boats. 

Here’s the story.  The picture is worth a thousand words!

“Hey Mom!  This is how it is usually when we pull up to the dock.”

 

 

“This is how it is now.  There is no way we can get out of the boat!”

And for reference, here are a few pictures of the lake about 3 weeks ago.  I am sure the water levels are even lower now.  We are all praying for rain!

A picture slideshow by Smilebox

Best. Movie. Ever.

Okay, maybe not the best ever, but it certainly ranks up there very near the top! 

 

 

We attended Homeschool Day at the Movies last Friday.  We went to see the movie Dolphin Tale.  If you haven’t seen it, you must go see it!

We had a crazy theater experience, and it turned out to be close to a private showing for 4 homeschool families from our homeschool group.

It was such a great movie!  I think we may even take Mr. TD to see it again this weekend. 

Our Way to Learn Geography

  In January of this year, one of my brothers realized his boyhood desire of driving an 18-wheel truck for a living.  I am not sure what inspired this dream, whether it was our neighbor across the street who also drove a truck for a living or the endless number of movies about truck driving that were filling theaters at the time, I do not know.  Either way, he is driving all over the United States and at least once a week, he sends me a text message with his pick-up and drop-off locations for the week.  We have been tracking them on a large map.   Princess TD and Little TD take turns adding cities to the map.

We ended up changing the original small map pins for larger ones that would show up in the picture.  We have also decided to track Daddy’s travels as well.  The white pins are where my brother travels, and the dark purple pins are where Mr. TD travels.  We are on track to learn most of the states in the continental US by the end of the school year.  I think it is time to pull out our Star Spangled State book and learn more about each of the states where our family travels.

 

Happy Birthday Uncle Brian!!!

Princess TD’s Super Summer

It is hard to believe summer went by so fast this year.  It is also hard to believe I am so behind on posting pictures. 

Princess TD has had a very eventful summer! 

She started with her first ever ballet performance, where she was a flower.  She performed beautifully and is now enjoying a more challenging year of ballet lessons. 

Next came AHG summer camp.  We had so much fun with our friends in TX1318!  For Princess TD, camp gave her a bit of a challenge.  She attempted the ropes course.  While she was waiting for her turn, she lost a tooth!  She did a great job climbing all the way to the top, but once there, she couldn’t make herself navigate the ropes.  I was very proud of her for even trying…that was WAY up there and many of the moms who tried couldn’t believe the girls were doing it so well!

In July, Princess TD had her 8th birthday!  She participated in the local parade ON her birthday.  It was a special treat for her!  One of the badges she completed last spring with her AHG troop, was Social Skills & Etiquette, so she wanted to have a tea (lemonade) party with her AHG and ballet friends.  It was a sweet party and all of the girls were great!

I would say the highlight of her summer was ordering and receiving her American Girl doll.  She saved her own money and purchased the doll herself along with 1 outfit.  That was all she could afford.  She is saving now for more clothes.  I do have to say that she takes really good care of Lilly Anne, much better than her other dolls.

At the end of the summer, we had to make a hard decision to change to another AHG troop in the area.  We were asked to switch our ballet class to the regular meeting day of our original troop, so we were forced to look for another troop.  We just had our first meeting and Princess TD did a great job helping the girls (all new to AHG) perfect the sign and the salute.  I will be forever grateful to the wonderful trio of  A.N.E. for starting AHG in this area and for introducing us to the awesome program.  It is wonderful to see how many new families are being touched by this great ministry!

Here are a few pictures to give you an overview of Princess TD’s Super Summer!

Customize a picture slideshow

First Day of School

Our first day of school was very unique this year.  I had planned to spend a year and a half working on the current curriculum because I thought it was a bit of a stretch skill wise for both of them.  So, we didn’t “begin” a new level of our curriculum this fall.  I guess it wasn’t strange for the kids, but it was very strange for me.  It just doesn’t seem like a new school year without new curriculum.  We will be finishing up soon, since both kids are just cruising through their work!  Here are pictures of both of them on the “first day” of this school year!

Princess TD

 

Little TD

Best buddies!

Apparently in the craziness of last fall, I missed taking first day of school pictures.  That is likely because we were doing our first day of school in the basement of my mom’s condo as she was recovering from major cancer surgery.  In case you would like to see how they have grown, you can see their first day of school pictures from 2 years ago here.

The Weather Explained by a 5 Year Old

It was raining the other day when we were working on school.  Yes!  Drought stricken Texas was blessed with rain!  We received almost 2” over the 3-day period when it rained.  Both Princess TD and Little TD were jumping up and down at the sight of the raindrops falling from the sky. 

I digress.

The rain was just a nice pitter patter, no thunder or lightning that day.

Little TD jumps in with his explanation of the weather. (This is what he said to the best of my recollection…I was trying so hard not to chuckle, that I am sure I have left out a detail or two.  My thoughts will be in green.)

“You know Mom, the rain is God pouring a glass of water.” I instantly wanted to go check to see if there was some water spilled somewhere in my kitchen since he had just refilled his water cup.

“And the thunder is Him banging on a drum, or maybe bowling, it just depends on the way He feels.”  Okay.

“Oh, and the lightening is him turning off and on the light.  It could be turning off and on a flashlight too.”  Mmm hmm.

“And those one clouds that look like those things, um, cotton balls.  Those are Mrs. (long pause)…those are what Mrs. (draws a blank again) uses to take off her nail polish.”  Here’s where the holding in the chuckles begins.

“Oh and Sissy, you know those dark clouds.  Those are the ones she’s already used.”  I thought I was going to lose it here!  I had to get up and go check my kitchen floor at this point.  Oh, and no water was spilled.

 

At the homeschool conference we attended recently, we attended a seminar about killing dreams of the people in your life.  I do believe I could qualify for this title, since I am not much of a dreamer and I attack everything logically.  Mr. TD is more of a dreamer than I am, however, he’s pretty logical too.  So we have been gently reminding each other not to kill our kids dreams, especially when reality will come along and fix some of the assumptions naturally.  This was an opportunity for me not to kill the vivid imagination of my sweet 5 year old son, and hopefully provide the few people who read this blog, a really good chuckle!

The Long and Winding and Very Hilly Road

I really have the best intentions on keeping up with this blog. I know I haven’t done a great job. Really, I haven’t done a great job at anything lately. I haven’t been a good wife. I haven’t been a good mom. I haven’t been a good homeschool teacher. I have not been good at any of my roles lately. I have been thinking about what to do with my mom and about my mom and her health and what seems to be the lack of concern on her part. I have been consumed with these thoughts day and night for nearly a year now.

When we started down this road a year ago, I didn't expect it to be so winding and hilly.  I expected a straight path from problem to solution.  (My engineering brain at work again.) Life this last year has proven to be like our drive on the Blue Ridge Parkway last fall; up and down, left and right, and sometimes you go down so quickly, that it makes you a bit sick to your stomach. 



In talking with my uncle a couple of weeks ago, he suggested for me not to be obsessive about my mom and all of her needs to the detriment of my family. That was just what I needed to hear. It is time for me to shift responsibility back to where it belongs. It is her responsibility to fight the cancer. It is her responsibility to keep hydrated. It is her responsibility to take her medicines on time. It is her responsibility to eat 3 meals a day. It is her responsibility to quit smoking. I can’t make her want get better and live. It reminds me of the old saying, “You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.” That is where we are with her now. We have lead her to the place where she can receive care from those who love her, but we can’t make her WANT to get well.

I will continue to be responsible for her finances. That is something I can do without harming my family. I will continue to pray for her healing and for her desire to live. I can love her, even when it is hard.

For the last 2 weeks, I have made the trip from home to Louisiana twice to help deal with the doctors’ appointments and the plan for the future. We have been so consumed by the recurring UTI, that we didn’t even consider the possibility that something else might be wrong. This last Monday, we went for a follow-up appointment with her urologist and found out about the mass in one of her kidneys. This was the first we had heard of this. He began to scramble to get a CT or PET scan done, indicating that he wanted to do surgery this week.

As I type this, we are waiting to get approval from her insurance for a PET scan to further investigate an abnormality in her kidney. She was supposed to have a CT scan this morning, but she has not been keeping herself hydrated, so her kidneys are not functioning properly, so she can’t have the contrast. My sister and I were both there with her last week and even with both of us watching, we couldn’t keep her hydration at a level where her kidneys function properly. It is out of our hands.

Please pray for my sister, my brothers and me to have wisdom as we make decisions about the future of my mom’s care.

For now, we rest in the knowledge that this is only temporary and that someday we will see the light at the end of the tunnel.

It's been awhile...

It seems like just a few weeks ago I posted here.  Time has flown by so quickly.  I guess that happens when you are preoccupied with an illness combined with normal everyday family activities. 

Over the next few days, I will be updating you on quite a few things that have been happening around the TD Family household.  For now, I will start with the most obvious.

Princess TD cut off her hair!!

Yes.  She finally let my stylist cut her hair - it only took 4 tries!!  She decided that she wanted to let it grow long enough to donate it to a charity.  While most kids her age donate to Locks of Love, she opted to go with Pantene Beautiful Lengths.  With the Pantene program, her hair is guaranteed toward making a wig for a cancer patient.  She really wanted that.  She helped my cousin, Jo, pick out her wig after her diagnosis, so this was dear to her heart. 

I am so proud of my little girl for being so generous.

We have had a few tears over the missed long hair, but she is convinced it will be long again next week.  Well, it won't actually be next week, but it will grow back!

Make your own collage

In case you were wondering about the song, she said this was her favorite song.  It is called When I Get to Heaven by PureNRG.

The Homeschool Mother's Journal - Week 2

In my life this week...

We took off school last week to work on redoing our kitchen floor.  It was a big job and the whole family helped get it done.  We were very grateful for the help from Grandpa and Grandma.  We wouldn't have been able to do it so quickly without them!


On another note, my mom had her last chemo treatment this past Friday.  She will have another follow up with her oncologist in a month, at which point he will run further tests to see how she is doing.  We are all praying that she can be finished with chemo and that the cancer has not returned.  She recently ran out of cigarettes and mentioned to my sister that she was "done" now.  I only pray that is true!

In our homeschool this week...

It is always a slow start back when we have taken time off school.  Since we took off last week to work on redoing our kitchen floor, today was the first day back and it was crazy!  I am hopeful that the week will end on a good note once we all get back into the swing of things.

Places we are going & people we are seeing...

Just before our week off, we took a field trip to our local aquarium with our homeschool group.  We had a wonderful time with a great group of people!  We even got to have one of Princess TD's friends hang out with us for a day. 

My favorite thing this week was...


On our field trip, I was able to convince Princess TD and her friend to touch the stingrays in the touch tank! That was priceless!  Princess TD has always been afraid to touch, but the two of them together developed the courage they needed.  They both were afraid of the sharks, but it was so much fun teaching them both about the stingrays and sharks.  Princess TD and Little TD have seen the pictures of the sharks we saw on one of our SCUBA diving trips and really aren't afraid of them, but it was priceless seeing the eyes of her friend as I described how close were were to them. 

What's working/not working for us...

Obedience.  First time obedience.  That is always a challenge.

Homeschool questions/thoughts I have...

We finished our reading program we have been working with for a year.  We started a new one, Drawn Into the Heart of Reading.  I love the program, but my brain is not comprehending how to make all of this happen.  I am sure that I am just making it more complex than it needs to be; I have a tendency to do that.

A photo to share...

The Crazy Aquarium Kids!

Our New Kitchen Floor

We have been planning and saving for a while for a new floor in our kitchen. Something more urgent always came up, so it has taken us a couple of years to have the money to replace our 13 year old, contractor grade linoleum. It is amazing that it even lasted as long as it did! Here is the transformation...

Picture slideshow personalized with Smilebox

It was a great family project!  After stirring all of the dust and debris, my allergies have been going bonkers, but they are beginning to subside now and will be even better once I complete a deep cleaning of the house!  We can't wait to have everyone over to see our new floor...maybe we'll just have to have a party!

The Homeschool Mother's Journal - Week 1

I stumbled on this meme and thought it would be a good way to get back into blogging again. I know the far away family wants to know how we are doing and what we are doing.

In my life this week...

In my last post, I shared what all has been going on in our lives for the last few months.  I have been overwhelmed with the outpouring of love and concern from friends and family.  It is always so comforting to know that others are praying for you.

In our homeschool this week...

This week was as perfect as a homeschool week could be!  Princess TD moved from carrying to borrowing in math with no difficulty...which is amazing considering the struggle we had with carrying to the hundreds place (and beyond) the previous week.  She is reading like crazy and devouring all books with ease.  Little TD took off with his reading/phonics lessons this week too.  He is so thrilled that he is learning to read and can't wait until he's finished with the "red book" so he can get his very own library card!

Places we are going & people we are seeing...

We had a great time last week at our homeschool group park day and also at the annual Valentine's Day ice skating party.  Both Princess TD and Little TD are having a blast comparing the Valentine cards they received and talking about the friends they saw.

This week we will again be headed out to park day for a fun afternoon in the warmth of the soon to be Texas spring.  We will also be attending our American Heritage Girls meeting for the first time this month...the previous one was cancelled due to the icy conditions!

My favorite thing this week was...

Seeing Princess TD and Little TD light up when they figured out what they were doing.  I never grow tired of that!

What's working/not working for us...

Right now, everything is working for us.  We seem to have found our groove.  I love our curriculum, with a few changes to fit my kids, mainly science and Bible.

Homeschool questions/thoughts I have...

Do I need to slow down, or just let things go?  Right now I am letting it ride, taking it one day at a time.

A photo to share...

Here is Princess TD at the Valentine ice skating party.  Little TD didn't skate.

Torn

I have been absent from here because I have been finding it very difficult to share all that has been going on in our lives. My mind is constantly filled with scenarios of how the next few days/months/years will play out with our new life in dealing with the cancer. I can't seem to get past the constant swirling thoughts in my few moments alone to get written what we have been doing in school and in life.

When I begin thinking about how to take care of Mom when she's 800+ miles away, I just can't seem to figure out what to do about it. My sister has been doing a phenomenal job of taking care of her as she goes through the chemotherapy treatments. The question that plagues both of our minds is 'where do we go from here?' and I feel completely inadequate to answer that question. I haven't been present for the doctor appointments, I don't have the opportunity to ask any questions of them and I am finding that very frustrating. I can't get my mind to process a solution when I don't have the data. That is just my engineering brain at work.

You see, I have been helping my cousin as she has gone through breast cancer at the same time my mom has been dealing with bladder cancer. The difference is that my cousin is here in town and has allowed me to be there for her doctor appointments. I have had the opportunity to ask questions of the doctors, get the facts, get the plan and help her to process and move through the diagnosis, surgery, chemo and soon the reconstruction. She has appreciated my help and wanted my help. Now, I am not saying this has been an easy process. It has been hard in fact. I have given of my time, my energy (both physical and mental) and neglected other things that probably shouldn't have been neglected. But, I would do it again in a heartbeat. No one should have to go through this alone, and I am honored that she asked me to go through this journey with her.

On the other hand, in my mom's case, she was at home for the first part and with my sister now. Her doctor in St. Louis was more than happy to discuss anything and everything with me over the phone. I was able to ask as many questions as I had and she was patient and answered all of them. I have learned all I know about bladder cancer and its treatment from the internet. I guess the most important facts being that is was caused by her decades of smoking and that it is one of the most recurring cancers.

So what do we do now? That is the question that plagues me.

Mom is still smoking. She doesn't truly believe that is what caused her cancer. She is not taking care of her basic needs. She isn't being responsible. She doesn't ask the doctors questions, she doesn't want to know. She doesn't interact with me and my family when she is here with us. She isn't eating well. She refuses to take anti-depressants to get through this time.

How can we send her home to live alone when this is how she is behaving?

If we don't send her home, where will she go?

How do we pay for her to live?


In Matthew 6:25-34, we are told not to worry about anything that God will take provide for our needs. I do find myself worrying about this situation way too often. When I realize I am worrying, I pray. I feel in a lot of ways that if we let Mom go home alone, it would be similar to sending a young child out to live on their own. How would you not worry about that?